Guy Who Plays As Saints Wins Another Game
Brian Lawson, better known by his XBOX Live gamertag, ifoughtthelaw12, won another game online today as the New Orleans Saints.
“It was a tough, hard-fought win,” said Lawson. “We were up by like 17 at the end of the third. The Raiders are pretty tough.”
Lawson is not considered by Madden Online Analysts to be one of the best gamers on XBOX Live, nor is he even considered to be all that skilled at Madden. His opponent, 2good4u, agreed with these analysts.
“[D]at dude jus throws 2 tha backs an u cant cover [R]eg [B]ush,” 2good4u said via XBOX Live text message. “He got [B]ush [C]olston [M]oore and sum other guys. I dont got ne wepons on my team[.]”
“That’s his own damn fault for picking the Raiders,” responded Lawson with a smug look on his face that just needed to be slapped off. “I pick a good team because I want to win.”
2good4u’s text response to Lawson was undecipherable, and several language experts determined that his message was probably written in some crude dialect of English that has not yet been studied.
Lawson mostly just passed on every single play, and halfback Reggie Bush led the team with 15 receptions for 168 yards and two touchdowns on the day. Quarterback Drew Brees finished with 412 passing yards and eight touchdowns. All but five plays run by Lawson utilized a five wide receiver formation.
“I ran about six different plays,” confessed Lawson, unknowingly giving his horrible gameplan away to any future opponents. “I think that if you have enough guys running around, someone will get open.”
In fact, on one particular play, Brees held the ball for approximately fifteen seconds as Lawson watched receiver Lance Moore run in circles, trying to escape the coverage of cornerback Chris Johnson.
In other news, no one really cared about the win in the XBOX Live community or anywhere else, considering Lawson isn’t even ranked in the top 100 yet, and probably won’t be considering the number of online gamers who are more skilled at the game playing as the Saints and Colts.
“You got to be at least kind of good at Madden to be the best with the Saints,” said killerz32, the self-proclaimed top-ranked gamer who plays as the Saints. “I’ll admit, I don’t really know much about football strategy, I’ve never watched a Saints game, and I’m not even sure I know what a left tackle is, but these guys basically do all the work themselves. I just look around and I can throw the ball to the guys who aren’t next to any defensive guys. It’s not that hard.”
“I’m not even a Saints fan. They’re like my fourth or fifth favorite team at best,” admitted Lawson. “I like the Redskins, but they kind of suck so I like the Saints online.”
Calls placed to the front office of the Redskins, explaining the infidelity of Lawson and how he abandoned his team for a much more talented team were not returned. It was speculated that Washington’s General Manager was too hurt by Lawson’s betrayal to provide an interview.
“It’s all about the wins,” added Lawson. “With the Saints, I don’t actually have to be good at the game to get some easy wins. But for some reason, my gamer reputation is only two stars. I guess it’s just hard to be on the top because of all the haters you have to beat to get there.”
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dude seriously wtf…im ballin this shtt is 2 damm funny…
i love people who just play as good teams and think that there good come to a real tournament and see how they do. there is only two ways to be good at madden
1. spend all of your time playing the game
2. have a high football IQ
the majority of people either do number one or a little of both personally i do okay at tournaments and barely play the game so im more of the second. the point im trying to make is anyone who thinks theyre good for playing as a good team is obviously only a online ranked game bum
I believe that the raiders have the fastest and the are tied for the best defense in the game with aprox. a 86 rating. the thing that is their downfall is their offense which has good receivers but with a system that makes their qb not able to throw to their big play receivers and their trio of decent running backs and a amazing TE its not that hard to put up 21 as long as you have the defense plan. and its easy to tell that when you admit you have no football strategy. your a bum. play me and id destroy you. i dont need to use anything but my head. no rocket catch no nano no fag defense. these so called top ranked players should be playing with teams like the rams and beating people playing with the saints that is skill. as for me i play as the titans. my favorite team.
sorry superman gotta disagree with ya i dont think your a tourney guy and if you are i doubt youve ever played for big money and im not hating on you for that because im newer to the community and i’ve never played in a really big game before but if you ever were playing for 10 thousand or more im sure you would Nano,RC, play fag D or run any legal exploit you could find because there would be $$$ on the line and nobody in their right mind would play as the Rams against a team like the cowboys to prove their skill maybe 7 years ago in madden where the game was completely stickwork and nothing to do with the teams you played as and if you really think your that great ill play you anytime just hit me up